Lost In The Beginning

The days dawn is blurry
The waft of the coffee lifts my eye lids
I yawn in forgotten sleep
Muscles stretch embracing the day
Through the window
I feel the cold lifting
I remember the end to my family

My heart spills a few more drops
I know I can't spend too much blood
On the past
There is a present and a future
Yet I begin each day with the past
Even so the past deprives everything else
I start each day with the dance of the limbo

People say I should strive to remain connected
My genetics don't allow for this
Better connected than biting pain
Yet I drink my coffee with pain and sugar
Each morning at dawn
At the cup's dreges
I close my eyes in the hope of their happiness